To Stan Goff (and please disregard the christy-imagery, the dedication is more about the lyrics):
I must now, sadly, remove Stan from my short list of manly allies.
The person who inspired me to carve my own, albeit unkempt, niche here in blogolandia seems to have gone all bonkers. Or something. He's not been forthcoming for the reasons for his bonkerness. But many of us thought of him as a good leader and a strong ally in a fight that never ends. And I'm sure just as many are sad to see him slip away.
I imagine that if I did write as I damn well should it would be easy for me, a white person who's bloggage totally misses the mark so often, to slip into self-isolation.
My hotel campaign has been my island lately.
No hotel campaign, no family, no one woman or man is an island. Guess we forget that sometimes.
Can we start again, Stan? Please come back to reality.
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The biggest irony that I saw was the projectionism. He accused me of betraying him, when he had betrayed me years ago. Deep down, I knew that he didn't know me all that well, and now it's been confirmed. But what did I expect? It's kind of hard to get to know a person that you can't see as human.
At the core was the liberalism. He didn't really get the politics of being a pro-feminist ally, and that was revealed too. How easy it was for him to feel attacked by a poor Black woman challenging his behavior in her own space. How quickly he saw enemies where there were none. How easily the misogyny and paternalism came to the surface. And all it took was one five-paragraph note of criticism.
This was a hard lesson to learn, but it had to be learned. It's never to late to start again, but I can't wait 'til that happens. I have to move on.
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